Dear "Disease"

Dear Disease,

I don't blame you. Others may, but they don't know you like I do. They blame you for my habit to drink and use to excess. They blame you for my imperfect biochemistry. But you and I both know: they're misinformed.

You're not at fault for any of these things, because these things aren't themselves faulty. I certainly think differently than those who seem to function more or less in step with social protocol. They live well and happily because, presumably, they don't suffer from your vicious influence. I'm told there's something “wrong” with me, implying it's you deforming my otherwise perfect disposition and compelling me to act contrary to the “natural” order. They believe that a person not under your wicked spell will behave perfectly well, thus allowing them to function and operate without conflict in the world as it is. Give me a break!

They're misled, you're guiltless, and I'm off the hook. Nevertheless, you must be dealt with.

Though there's nothing inherently wrong (or right) with me (or anyone for that matter), you've caused me to lose a great many precious things. I'm not sick, and you're not strictly speaking a disease. You're merely a trait of mine – to reject standard modes of conduct and to contradict social norms. By necessity, this tendency disallows me to participate fully in the good things offered by the cultural gatekeepers.

Therefore, because you stand in defiance of convention, I must choose not to pay you the deference I believe you're due. I must choose to live peacefully in the world, and ask you not to wreak havoc as you've done.

I'm not above begging. You're a good companion. We've accomplished a great deal together. On the other hand, I'm susceptible to heartache, and you must do me the kindness of retreating from my faculty. Perhaps the time will come (when appropriate) that I'll call on you again to set a record straight or to present the truth of a matter. For now, and until I come for you, you may rest. Be at peace, and I will do the same.

Sincerely,

Your Friend